


One Perfect Game: Tavros' Life, In Fiduspawn

by traceExcalibur



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Fiduspawn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-10
Updated: 2012-07-10
Packaged: 2017-11-09 13:59:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/456264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/traceExcalibur/pseuds/traceExcalibur
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tavros just wants to play his favourite game with some friends, but none of them seem very suitable Fiduspawn partners. Is one perfect game <i>really</i> too much to ask for?</p>
            </blockquote>





	One Perfect Game: Tavros' Life, In Fiduspawn

****

###  **Prologue**

Tavros Nitram had only a few goals in life, and the misfortune of picking the ones that seemed least attainable. He wanted to be able to fly, like his hero Pupa Pan, and though he hoped and hoped he knew it was an impossible dream. He wanted to prove to all his friends that the Boy Skylark class was _not_ useless, and he _could_ reach the highest level. Vriska shattered that dream just like his spine. Ever since then, he had wanted Vriska to leave him alone, and though her every text to him seemed to extol how “8oring” he was, she still insisted on pestering him.

Last, and not least, he wanted to be able to play a good, fun match of Fiduspawn with somebody. It was much, much more difficult than it sounded.

 

****

###  **Vriska Serket**

Once, before the FLARP incident, Tavros had tried asking Vriska to play Fiduspawn with him. She laughed for a good half-minute straight – he was pretty sure he counted 64 “ha!”s in total. She collapsed to the ground and doubled over, almost crying with laughter. The typical Serket melodrama – her overreaction might have amused him if he weren’t so scared of what she would do next. To his surprise, though, after she finished clutching her chest and wheezing, she agreed to a game.

She showed up at his house with a sneer on her face. “Man, is this it? Pretty shitty house, if you ask me. But they don't give lowbloods as many cool options or as much space, do they? Laaaaaaaame!”

“Uh, yeah,” he began, and she walked past him without waiting to hear what else he had to say.

“Wow, what a mess! Almost as much as my room, but not quite! And what's with these fairies on the walls? I didn't take you to be the perverted type.”

He followed after her, kind of annoyed that she had already taken charge of his own house. “I'm not, I just think they're pretty. And I like fairies, and that, uh, kind of stuff.”

“Fairies are fake, and bullshit, and for losers. Do you really want to be a loser, Tavros? Because I don't think you do.”

Tavros frowned. “I don't really think, that I am that much of a loser.”

Vriska put her hands on her hips and scoffed. “Reeeeeeeeally?”

“You know what, I think I would prefer it if, uh, if you left and we didn't play this, if that's, alright with you...”

Vriska refused to leave, of course, and forced Tavros to play through an entire game of Fiduspawn with her. She stomped him handily.

He didn't have very much fun.

 

****

###  **Gamzee Makara**

Tavros’ best bro and fellow slamscallion Gamzee seemed like the most obvious choice for a Fiduspawn partner, but Tavros soon discovered that the sopor which fuelled Gamzee’s dopest rhymes also stunted his playing ability.

“Shiiiit bro, look at this little motherfucker, bein’ all fuckin’ colourful and stuff,” Gamzee said with his typical airy tone, rolling his Oogonibomb around in his palm. “Where’s it even get off, up and gettin’ it’s crazy colour on?”

“Uh, throwing it to the ground, and activating it, that's the thing that you’re supposed to be doing right now.” Tavros reminded him.

Gamzee paid him no mind. “Yeah but just, be all checkin’ it out, bro. What the motherfuck, man?”

“Would you like me to go first, and, show you how you’re supposed to play?”

“Yeah bro, just do what all is feelin’ good and dandy to be fuckin’ doin’, you hear?”

Tavros sighed and held his Oogonibomb up, aiming it towards his Host Plush. He threw it on the ground and it exploded with a pyoof, kicking up dust and leaving a Fidusucker in its wake. Gamzee shouted and reared back in his chair, eyes wide. The Fidusucker crept up on the Host Plush and planted a Fiduseed inside it’s stomach, which soon matured and exploded into the form of the mighty Horsaroni.

“Hooooly motherfuck, man, that horse bro totally jumped out of the poor plushie guy!”

“Yes, Gamzee, that is kind of the point of the game, like I told you, about ten minutes ago.”

“Shit dude, I all up an’ forgot the whole thing you was sayin’, cause I was lookin’ at all those motherfuckin’ fairy girls on your wall, and bein’ like, damn, these are some miraculous fuckin’ fairy babes and shit.”

It was at that point that Tavros decided to abandon the game. A ten-minute, ridiculously sicknasty rap-off was a far more productive use of their time.

 

****

###  **Karkat Vantas**

\-- adiosToreador [AT] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--

AT: hEY, kARKAT,

AT: wANT TO PLAY SOME fIDUSPAWN, wITH ME,

CG: OH, YEAH, BECAUSE I’M DEFINITELY GOING TO HIKE UP MY PANTS AND TREK ALL THE WAY DOWN TO YOUR HIVE JUST TO THROW SOME ASSHOLE BOMBS AROUND AND WATCH PLUSHIES MAKE OUT WITH EACH OTHER’S CORPSES.

CG: THAT IS DEFINITELY MY IDEA OF A FUCKING AWESOME DAY.

AT: rEALLY,

AT: yOU, dON’T SOUND VERY SERIOUS,

CG: WELL FUCK ME, HOW’D YOU FIGURE ME OUT?

AT: lYING, iS SOMETHING i’D SAY THAT, yOU AREN’T THAT GOOD AT, uH, iF YOU DON’T MIND ME COMMENTING ON ONE OF YOUR FLAWS,

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling adiosToreador [AT] \--

AT: i THINK i, hIT THE NAIL ON THE HEAD, sO TO SPEAK,

AT: aND THAT IS WHY YOU LEFT,

AT: i APOLOGIZE IF i MADE YOU SAD,

AT: bUT ACTUALLY YOU'RE A JERK SOMETIMES, sO i AM NOT THAT SORRY,

AT: i'LL SHUT UP NOW,

 

****

###  **Nepeta Leijon**

Nepeta, unfortunately, lived too far away for Tavros to play a game with her in person. Even if she did, his cat allergies would probably interfere; though she wasn't _actually_ a cat in real life, her lusus was, and she would undoubtedly be covered in dander. Still, Fiduspawn Online was nearly as fun as the real thing, and so Tavros invited her to a game with him.

It took a while to explain the rules, but Nepeta proved adept at the game once they began. She could effectively combo her cards, and she knew how to summon Fiduspawns whose abilities were strong against Tavros'.

Unfortunately, while she _could_ play the game well, she was _far_ more interested in summoning the cutest Fiduspawns she could find, and concocting elaborate roleplay scenarios involving them. Fiduspawn Online, however, was focused on the competitive aspect of the game – a necessity given its video-game format. Roleplays, thusly, didn't work within the boundaries of the game, and as a result Nepeta kept dragging him into Trollian chats and abandoning the actual game. It was a shame, really, because Tavros enjoyed her cheery personality, and suspected she might actually prove a formidable foe if she cared to play the game properly.

Tavros scrolled further down his trollslum and looked for someone else to contact...

 

****

###  **Feferi Peixes**

As it turned out, Feferi was a good catch, as she might say in fishing terms. She learned the rules, loved to play, and had a competitive edge to her that he hadn't seen in anyone since before the accident. Her trash talk was a little ridiculous (SUCK—ERFIS)( ON T)(AT, MOT)(--ERGLUBB--ER!!) but every match with her was a blast regardless.

Unfortunately, as heir to the Alternian empire, and moirail to a wannabe genocidal warlord, she was usually too busy to play with him.

 

AT: wOW, i THINK YOU MIGHT ACTUALLY, wIN THIS GAME,

AT: yOUR STRATEGY IS, iMPROVING QUITE A LOT,

AT: iT'S, iMPRESSIVE, }:)

CC: Tank you! 38)

CC: I reely enjoy playing t)(is game wit)( you, you know.

CC: It's a great way to de-stress, and buoy do I need that rereef sometimes!

AT: uH,

CC: Oh. I mean, relief.

CC: Get wit)( the puns, silly!

AT: rIGHT,

 

Tavros was about to click on his Oogonibomb and summon another Fiduspawn when Tinkerbull poked him on the shoulder.

 

AT: hANG ON, tINKERBULL IS ASKING ME ABOUT SOMETHING,

AT: i WILL BE RIGHT BACK, uH, iF IT ISN'T TOO MUCH OF A BOTHER TO WAIT,

CC: S)(ore! I will be )(ere.

 

Tavros took care of his Lusus' issue – something small, that only took a few minutes – but when he returned...

 

CC: Uggggggg)()()(, --Eridan is bugging me again! 3>8(

CC: Always wit)( t)(e w)(ining and t)(e bugging and t)( moray-ling.

CC: I'm saury, but I )(ave to go take care of )(im. )(e's my frond, and w)(ale, if I don't, w)(o will?

CC: W)(oops, t)(at was a boatload of puns up t)(ere. I t)(ink I make t)(em more often w)(en I am stressed! 38O

CC: I )(ope you are smart enoug)( to understand it all!

\-- cuttlefishCuller [CC] ceased trolling adiosToreador [AT] \--

AT: oH,

AT: uH, oKAY,

AT: gOODBYE, i GUESS

AT: }:(

 

Was _anyone_ a good Fiduspawn partner? The prospect was looking grim, and Tavros was running low on friends to play with.

He once had a best friend who absolutely adored the game, but she didn't play with him anymore...

 

****

###  **Aradia Megido**

Aradia was the perfect Fiduspawn partner. She was fun and excitable, always ready to join him for a game, and happy to play it. Tavros fondly remembered the times they sat in his room – or in hers, either was good – for hours on end, tossing Oogonibombs and watching their Host Plushes writhe in terror and just having a blast. She was a great friend, and at times he wondered if she was something more.

He never found out. After the FLARP accident, Aradia stopped showing up at his house. She nearly cut herself off from her friends entirely. She only talked to him online, and even then, she was a boring, depressed husk of the girl she used to be. She was uninterested in playing Fiduspawn, or playing anything, really.

She was just another good thing that Vriska took from him.

Tavros couldn't help but wonder how much more he would lose to her.

 

The answer, as it turned out, was his life. It was pathetic, really, how he died, and he couldn't help but think that his final thoughts were the most pathetic of all. He had, of course, thought about how afraid he was to die, and about the mistakes he'd made and the regrets he'd had. He had flown, but never truly found his wings. He had never become the best Boy Skylark, or the best Page of Breath. He had never fixed his problems with Vriska, one way or another.

But the final thing to run through his mind, after Vriska had run him through? Never since Aradia died had he played a perfect match of Fiduspawn.

 

i WISH THAT i COULD PLAY fIDUSPAWN AGAIN,

aND THAT,

i COULD ACTUALLY FIND SOME FRIENDS, wHO WOULD PLAY IT WITH ME,

wOULDN'T THAT,

bE NICE,

  


****

###  **Epilogue**

“Ok so check it, I pull out this Clawshock card thingy and do an extra point of damage with my Terra...uh, how do you say this? Terrahawka? That thing.”

Dave Strider tosses a card out into the air and his monster glows, gaining electric talons. Rose Lalonde leans over to him and whispers something; Tavros can't quite catch it from where he's standing.

“You two, look like you have some good strategies,” he admits, “but I doubt you can beat, the combined might of Team Charge!”

“Haha, yeah! Sorry, but your human asses are toast!” Aradia brushes her hair underneath her red hood and tosses out an Oogonibomb, revealing a new Fidusucker with which to spawn an additional monster.

“Not so hasty, Megido.” Rose says. “You've activated my Trapslammer!”

A steel weight materializes in the sky and crashes down on the Fidusucker, killing it instantly.

“That's two points for Team Green Sun, putting them just ahead of Team Charge!” announces Feferi, the scorekeeper. Nepeta cheers them on from the sidelines, alongside her reluctant moirail, Equius.

Tavros grins. They're a point behind, but he's still got a few tricks and bombs up his sleeve. Aradia does too. The two of them can beat Team Green Sun for sure.

And even if they don't?

For the first time in a long time, he's having fun, and that's what matters most.

 


End file.
